Letting go
It's Friday the 13th. I knew today couldn't be all rainbows and butterflies. I made one of the hardest choices today, but one I made together with my mom and my husband with confidence that it was the right one. We put Alvin to sleep, and as he peacefully passed, my only advice to others with a suffering pet is that you won't have any regrets when you make the final decision. Your pet will be grateful to be free of pain and discomfort. It's never easy but if you feel in your gut it should be done or are even thinking about it, it may be time. It's best to let go before your pet suffers enough that you only wish you did it sooner. This is how I feel about Alvin. The time was perfect. He has been going downhill and wasn't going through major suffering that we could see but his quality of life was diminishing. I wanted him to pass with dignity and not get to a point that watching him live is painful; that's a memory no one wants to bear. and we could only blame ourselves for allowing that to happen. I wanted to let him go when he was already at a point of limited happiness and that there was little more we could do for him. Besides letting him have the luxury of escaping his suffering. I'm so glad that we did.
His last day on earth was a good one. We spent the afternoon stroking Alvin outside on a beautiful day followed by a long walk. We did a photoshoot to capture our last moments with our best friend. I sat in the backseat with him on our car ride to the vet. I held him in my arms and his fur caught my tears. I sobbed into his neck. My mom met us there since he has been a family dog in our lives these past 13 years and she knows him well and really felt with his decline that this was his time. We let him go and he drifted off. Leaving his lifeless body behind was one of the hardest things for me. Holding Alvin with no responses, watching him lay without his body rising with his breath was weird and depressing. To know he's just gone, and no longer exists. It was good to have closure and to have been the one to come to this final conclusion and decide what was best. That's what being a responsible pet owner means, that you sometimes need to make a hard choice that pets don't have the ability to make for themselves. I'm glad I had the privilege of having that choice- some people just wait until their pet is in pain and it's just too late and not fair.
I'm thankful for the strength I had to do this, and we will forever cherish Alvin and all his "Adventures" both good and bad. As a friend told us, we will not mourn his death but celebrate his life <3 Maybe it isn't all rainbows and butterflies, but I did give a butterfly presentation this morning, and our day ended with Alvin crossing over the rainbow bridge.. so there's a positive side to everything. I love you Alvin <3 <3 <3
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